Steady Now  

If I go feral
Get rid of the “Me” in reference to you, to him, to her
Lose the “Me” who bows to “Them”
Will I end up snarling in a corner
Showing the sharp of my teeth
Or will I cower
Turn up my under belly
Will I whimper as I’m caught and caged

If I go wild
Loose my self whole on to the world
Will I disappoint again
Waste love and money
Feeling and song
Will I lose again
Will I pain, pain, pain
Pay with body and blood?

If I refuse to swallow that pill
Will I stay plump,
Jolly round
Or will my skin hang loose
Like an old shirt I used to fit
Will the floods come
The wash, the gulps and gasps
Will this rush catch in my throat
Or will it move through me and out
Into the Golden Light at my finger tips and toes

If I let my self “be”
Go wild, Go feral
Lose the “me” in reference to all of it
To who I’ve become
Which “Me” is left
The girl who dances to the beat underneath
Who practices for the races
Knocks on the mayor’s door and demands the roads be paved
The grown woman who knows what she wants and how to get it
The gritty, shy woman who braves through it
Grins and bares it
Holds on, lets go

The me who feels it all
Steady now.

 

© 2008 Corine Demas