Elegiac Blues
for k.d. lang
in memory of Gary Elgar ("Drifter") - 1955-1984
You sing the blues my famous friend
so blue it hurts
my sensitive soul
with the ache of nostalgia
whenever I hear you
singing your blues on the radio
So blue I can tell you feel it too
this mournful longing for those innocent
days
when we were all first discovering the
full scope of our vision
and fame was still only a nebulous dream
What a phenomenal time that was...1980
- 81
when I lived with Drifter in the basement
on Ross Street
and you were staying off and on a few
blocks away
with Jaibyrd and Dee and the other women
of Domus
that funky old
house up on Michener Hill
What great parties we had...and all that
weird art and music
There was something
miraculous in the air that year
Some kind of creative alchemy
mixed in the flux of our collective Soul
We were like a psychic energy dynamo
plugged into
something wonderful
Our dreams came to life in spontaneous
poetry
sung to
a lighter shade of the blues
with the fluent inflections of your soaring
voice
intuiting Drifter's
weird dissonant chords
like you were tapped into the same source
of inspiration
amazing how it
all seemed to click like magic
as if a spirit
were suddenly singing through you
through
us all
through the instrument we were
Now those days are long gone
the old tribe's
all been scattered
in many different directions by the stiff
winds of change
Drifter dead now ten years since
his heart stopping murder
and though his
spirit still drifts by from time to time
we all miss him so much it hurts to remember
I just wish I could hear his voice again
Remember how he could inspire us
with just a flash of his encouraging smile
how his quirky, spontaneous sense of wonder
and his enormous love of life stimulated
us all
He had such a knack for turning us on
when he was with us anything seemed possible
and though he shrugged off the mantle
of mentor we put on him
he came to embody the spirit we all felt
How ephemeral and rare that kind of magic
is
we never
realized at the time
We thought it was something that would
last forever
Now we all mourn the passing of what we
shared
but yet it is
eternal...it pulls us together
though in space-time we have all drifted
apart
look how profound an impression it's made
it still shapes our visions and guides
our hearts
It's changed our lives and made us realize
the strange forces at work in this miraculous
world
That mysterious experience is what made
us artists
in the truest,
most beautiful sense of the word
And you...well since you hit the country
road to the big time
you've been riding
high on the planet's airwaves
The spirit sings through you now stronger than ever
Some say you're
one of the greatest singer's alive
It's good to know you're aware of where
it comes from
not so much from the heart as
through the heart from the Soul
from the source of all truly inspired Art
from that mysterious
spirit that makes us so human
As for me...well I'm still the crazy poet
a little older and wiser from rambling
around
but still crazy
enough to try to express
mysteries that
just can't be written down
Sitting here on this balcony looking
out over Vancouver
I
gaze toward the distant horizon
and as I struggle
to write these inadequate words
I feel the presence of that good old spirit
Then what a shock
as I write this poem
to hear a knock on the back porch window
and it's you...I haven't seen you for ages
I thought you'd be back on the road by now
You always had an uncanny sense of timing
and it hits me when you remind me what
day it is
...the day Drifter drifted off to Shadowland...
exactly ten years
ago that blue blue day
You say you've seen him a lot lately in
your dreams
and I feel a shiver run up my spine
and then just at that moment I'm called
to the phone
but when I answer
it all I hear is dead air
no dial tone...no voice...just silence
yet it seems someone's there
"Maybe it was Drifter," you say with a
smile
as though you
were expecting the call
Maybe it was...
...yeah...
it must have been
but with these kind of feelings
it's hard to tell
© 2006 Gary Lee